The Dysfunctional Deadskins...

>> Monday, October 26, 2009



I had planned on writing a blog tonight about just how much the ESPN MNF crew misses Emmitt Smith and his butcher of the english language, but I was sidetracked and began watching my Redskins grace national TV with a chance at redemption.

To preface...I have been a Redskins fan my entire life...born and raised on the burgundy and gold. In my 26 years on this earth, I've cheered for Mark Rypien, Gary Clark, Ricky Sanders and Art Monk. I've owned a Charles Mann jersey and even suffered through the Heath Shuler and Steve Spurrier debacles.

I've attempted to support our owner, Dan Snyder, and his ridiculous overpaying of past their prime free agents and his mistreatment of coaches, but this season has caused me to lose all support for this organization outside of the uniform.

As I sit here watching a crack baby attempt to lead this team down the field and watch a halftime score that resembles that of a UK-Florida game...it pains me to even admit that I'm a Skins fan...

As bad as I hate to say it....I'm now on the verge of feeling the same pain that Kris has had to suffer through with the idiocy of Al Davis and the terribleness that is the Oakland Raiders. Yes, this Redskins team is as terribly as the Oakland Raiders.

Ok, I can't believe those words were just typed on my keyboard...I think I'm done for the night.

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>> Sunday, October 25, 2009

Random Notes of the week...

OAKLAND SUCKS...thats all I got.

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Chubby of the Day...

>> Tuesday, October 20, 2009





God bless the SEC....courtesy of SEC Poon.

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Even A Dead Man Can't Rest...





We've all experienced the torment of a crazy woman in our life and now Steve McNair, even though his body is six feet deep is currently feeling the wrath of scorned women all over Nashville.

Sure, Stevie was a playa and I'm not condoning his adulterine ways, but is it possible for a woman to keep her damn mouth shut, considering he's dead? Was the cash flow that he put in their broke pockets not enough to suffice...that they now have to defame the deceased athlete even more following his death for a little more change?

Can we not remember Air McNair for what he did on the field?



The leadership qualities he possessed and the talent that blessed his right arm?

I think I'm going to step down off my soapbox now, but to see this bullshit still hitting the news is beyond ridiculous in my mind. How about some skank hoes shut their mouth for five minutes and let the man RIP.

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Chubby of the Day...

>> Monday, October 19, 2009



Olivia Wilde, FTW.

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Guess who's back...back again..

Well, I admit Derrick's post has inspired me to blog tonight and no not his thoughts on college football. It was 100% the picture of Megan Fox. Now I know you find yourself sitting there asking, Kris, how does Megan Fox inspire you to write a sports blog? To which I'll reply, "Who the hell cares? Just scroll down and keep looking at the picture..well after you thoroughly read this blog of course." I do have to throw props out at Derrick for the Mark Morrsion video though, totally ripped off my idea to bring the blog back in style. (Editor's Note: Derrick doesn't even have "Return of the Mack" on his IPOD..it's common knowledge that you can't get a party started without Mark Morrison) Then again, my poor ass doesn't even have an IPOD...so who am I to really judge with my 29.99$ mp3 player?

Okay, since this is a sports blog, I'll hit on a few topics as of late that has peaked my interest.

1st, of course, anyone that knows me, knows I have to brag on my Oakland Raiders for a couple of sentences. The Raiders played lights out yesterday (on defense that is). They are partly the inspiration behind this writting comeback. Now, I think about it, I don't think I have posted since the last time the Raiders won circa 4 weeks ago. I would go into specifics of how the Raiders were dialing up blitzes all afternoon and how that is not part of their normal man to man defense while rushing four d-linemen, but I doubt there are enough readers who actually care about the Raiders.

Next, Welcome back Tom Brady. I am glad you decided to prove a point yesterday and throw for 15 touchdowns in the 2nd quarter alone. My favorite part of all this, is the fact that you did it in a f*cking blizzard.

To rip off ESPN, I have got to hand out a big "C'mon Man" to Jim Zorn and the Washington Redskins. Is anyone else aware that every team the 'Skins have played have been 0 - whatever at the time? How pathetic can you get? To make matters worse, I hear word today that Jim Zorn has been stripped of his play calling duties? Way to give your head coach any type of credibiilty with the players Mr. Snyder. At least there are some teams that are more dysfunctional than the team in Oakland right now.

Speaking of falling off, what has happened to Mark Sanchez? This guy looked like the real deal the first three games of the season. Then all of a sudden, you lose to the Trent Edwards' lead Buffalo Bills? Oh thats right, Edwards went out sometime in the 2nd quarter. I honestly have no idea, who replaced him? I'm glad this is happening, I already can tell I hate Rex Ryan much like I hated his brother Rob. Oh and their dad, Buddy as well. For whatever reason, I have a personal vendetta against the whole Ryan family.

Finally, as I am sitting here typing, I just want to remind the world that I cannot stand Phillip Rivers. He is a whiny bitch. Wait not, he's not a bitch, he's a biatch. Yeah, I just took it gangsta on your ass Phillip. Would someone please tell me why he gets all the credit he gets? I find him to be mediocre at best. He just so happens to have so much talent around him, it makes him look adequate at best.

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The Return of Chubby of the Day...

>> Sunday, October 18, 2009



Seriously, what better way to return to normalcy on this blog..than a picture of Megan Fox...ass up...face down....

Enjoy folks.

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The PMB Returns...



There are times in a man's life when some things are much more important than giving you a sarcastic opinion filled full of bullshit. Recently, not having a heart attack and getting my personal life in order have been a little more important than blogging on a consistent basis. However, I'm pulling my best Mark Morrison impersonation and reentering the game a rejuvenated blogger with a willingness to divulge more time into The PMB.

However, I don't know if the same can be said for my fellow bloggers, Kris and Gary. Kris may still make an occasional appearance, but it appears Gary will no longer be stopping by to give us his weekly diatribes on turf toe and/or the process of being a chubby individual.

So, if you've still been checking back on an occasional basis and our hits #'s seem to think that you have been...thanks for sticking it out during this town time.

Now onto the Sunday thoughts and rants involving college football...and maybe some Charlie Weis humor.

-As a Kentucky Alum its always great to see our team pull out that rare road win. This weekend turned out to be one of the greatest in a long time for Kentucky athletics with Calipari and company opening up with Big Blue Madness and UK knocking off the Auburn Fighting Cheezdiks down in Alabama for the first victory over the War Eagles since 1966. Congrats to the Wildcats!

-The SEC continues to show that it plays for the money on a weekly basis. The absolute atrocity that occurred down in Gainesville, Florida this weekend was a disgrace to college football and a game that is supposed to be decided "by the players." Florida was gift-wrapped a win against Bobby Petrino's crew and is still headed for another SEC championship game appearance. However, don't think the sub-par performance wasn't noticed, because the Crimson Tide is now sitting pretty at #1 in the coaches poll!

-The curse of Charlie Weis and his FUPA continues to dominate action up in South Bend. Seriously, Charlie when are you going to win a big game? I'm going to have start referring to you as the poor man's version of Mark Mangino and I don't want to do that!

Seriously, who you guys got in a male beauty pageant?

Charlie dressed in his ballerina costume...


or Mark Mangino eating some french fries?


I still think Charlie has a much more intimidating FUPA.

Ok, Ok...back on to normal things.

-Who is on the Iowa bandwagon? Nobody....ok, just making sure.

-I've always questioned just how much Jim Calhoun had to pay a player to come to ghetto ass Stoors, Connecticut and now I'm really going to begin questioning his antics. I mean...on what campus in America does a damn football player get STABBED to death. Well, thats exactly what happened on the lovely UCONN campus this weekend. RIP Jasper Howard.

I'll be back with more later and the return of the Chubby of the day!

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